Getting through the Holidays in One Piece

Holidays are again upon us. This ought to be a time of great joy, sharing and spending time with your love ones. However, for those of us with kids, and more so with special needs kids, the holidays can present unique challenges. Holidays can be overwhelming because they cultivate many stressors that may cause a child to erupt: absence of routine, overstimulation, being away from home, and one important one that many of us may overlook – parents’ stress.   Kids are “sponges”: when they sense you are stressed, they can get extremely overwhelmed. Your stress management skills are put to a test, no doubt about it. And it is paramount you pass the test.

So, mom, dad, it is time to review some crucial tips:

-        Being sensitive to your child’s needs and keeping familiar routines in place as much as possible are the best ways to avoid holiday havoc.

-        Prepare your child for the social event: Explain to your child what is going to happen ahead of time. Be specific about every detail that might occur in any given situation. If part of your holiday itinerary includes flies, prepare your child for the crowds he might encounter and explain him about security procedures. Be sure to include the fact that he might be asked to remove his shoes, walk through a “funny machine” and that someone might look through his things. New or unexpected situations can be very frightening for a child with autism and being prepared can help him cope. It may be helpful to create a picture book that will show the sequence of events and prepare him for the sights, sounds and people he might encounter.

-        Prepare the social event for your child: Avoid long trips whenever possible. Airports, planes and long car rides could be very stressful.

-        Stick to your normal routine as much as possible. Keep sleep and meal times as close to their usual time as possible.

-        Bring your child’s favorite snacks with you. Unfamiliar foods will leave your child hungry, which is literally a recipe for disaster.

-        Bring your child’s favorite movie, video game system, sensory and security toys. Having familiar items will give him a sense of normalcy and comfort.

-        Pre arrange for a quiet space for your child to retreat to when stimulus gets too intense and he needs a break.

-        Don’t give in to social expectations (“People are looking at us”) or worry about insulting your host or family members if you don’t abide by social norms. You are your child’s advocate, she is your priority. This means you don’t need to force your child to hug, kiss, shake hands or play games with anyone if they don’t want to. Try to motivate him instead. This goes for clothing as well. Don’t force your child to wear something or comb his hair if he really doesn’t want to. You have to pick your battles. In general terms, don’t force your child to do anything unless it involves a safety concern or an emergency.

-        Educate your family ahead of time if you feel necessary. You can explain to them possible behaviors that might occur so that you don’t find yourself constantly apologizing for your child’s behavior.

-        Know the triggers and read the precursors of challenging behaviors, such as facial expressions, changes in breathing, body movements, etc. Look for the signs that your child may be unraveling and retreat to your safe place. Preventing a meltdown is always easier than managing a tantrum once it begins.

Finally, relax and enjoy. You are your child’s barometer and if you are stressed out, he will be too.

Daniel Adatto

cadatto@tesidea.com

Behavior management vs. behavior modification

Behavior management and behavior modification are not exactly the same. In behavior modification the focus is on changing behavior by teaching functional equivalent replacement behaviors, while in behavior management the focus is on maintaining order. Hence, behavior modification focus on building functional (socially appropriate and valuable) behavior repertoires.

Behavior management skills are of particular importance to teachers in the educational system. Behavior management include all of the actions and conscious inactions to enhance the probability people, individually and in groups, choose behaviors already in their repertoires, which are personally fulfilling, productive, and socially acceptable.^[1]


There is a great deal of research related to "behavior change" and "behavior management". B.F. Skinner's approach says that anyone can manipulate behavior by first identifying what the individual finds rewarding. Once the rewards of an individual are known, then those rewards can be selected and provided in exchange for good behavior. Skinner calls this "Positive Reinforcement Psychology". In order to effectively address behavior problems, individual must be persuaded (motivated) to behave appropriately.

Behavior Management:

Many of the principles and techniques used are the same as behavior modification yet delivered in a less intensively and consistent fashion. Usually, behavior management is applied at the group level by a classroom teacher as a form of behavioral engineering to produce high rates of student work completion and minimize classroom disruption. In addition, greater focus has been placed on building self-control.

Brophy (1986) writes:

"Contemporary behavior modification approaches involve students more actively in planning and shaping their own behavior through participation in the negotiation of contracts with their teachers and through exposure to training designed to help them to monitor and evaluate their behavior more actively, to learn techniques of self-control and problem solving, and to set goals and reinforce themselves for meeting these goals." (p. 191) ^[2]

In general behavior management strategies have been very effective in reducing classroom and home disruption.^[3] In addition, recent efforts have focused on incorporating principles of functional assessment into the process.^[4] This means understanding the function (needs and wants) of the challenging behavior and developing interventions with the objective of teaching functional equivalent behaviors.

While such programs can come from a variety of behavioral change theories, the most common practices rely on the use of applied behavior analysis principles: positive reinforcement    and mild punishments (such as response cost and time-out). Behavioral practices such as differential reinforcement are commonly used.^[5] Sometimes, these are delivered in a token economy or a level system.^[6] In general the reward component is considered effective. For example, Cotton (1988) reviewed 37 studies on tokens, praise and other reward systems and found them to be highly effective in managing student classroom behavior.

Behavior Modification:

As parents and teachers we should be aware of the importance of incorporating behavior modification as a crucial component of our approach, especially when working with children with special needs. These kids do not learn from the environment like regular developed ones do. They have to be taught the appropriate behaviors that will replace the challenging behaviors ones. As I said in previous blogs, “We are in the business of building socially appropriate behaviors repertoires. We are behavior teachers.”

Daniel Adatto, BCBA

cadatto@tesidea.com

References

1.      ^ Baldwin J.D. and Baldwinn J.I. (1986). Behavior principals in everyday life (2nd Edition), Engle Wood Cliffs, New Jersey: Prentice Hall.

2.      ^ Brophy, J. (1986). "Classroom Management Techniques." Education and Urban Society 18/2, 182–194

3.      Brophy, J.E. (1983) "Classroom Organization and Management." The Elementary School Journal 83/4, 265–285.

4.      Angela Waguespack, Terrence Vaccaro & Lauren Continere (2006). Functional Behavioral Assessment and Intervention with Emotional/Behaviorally Disordered Students: In Pursuit of State of the Art. International Journal of Behavioral Consultation and Therapy, 2 (4), 463–474. [1]